Review

The Kettle of Fish has a bit of history about it, since it's opening in the 1950's it has been frequented by various artist, poets and musicians; the most notable of them being Dylan in the 1960's. That would be the guitar playing Bob Dylan rather than the guitar playing Dylan the Rabbit from The Magic Roundabout. Shame, I know.

Over the years The Kettle of Fish has moved sites 3 times, so technically you're not actually going to be drinking in a bar that Dylan used to (presumably) get hammered in, but one would assume he came for the atmosphere of the place rather than the fact that he really liked the building it was in. Some of that atmosphere must survive because the word is it's still popular with his ilk today, the fact that the bar now sits on the site of another bar with a celebrated literary tradition, The Lion's Head, probably helps. As a result of all this artistic tradition floating about the place, people seem incapable of talking about the Kettle of Fish without using the word eclectic. Usually people are referring to the cliental, but one native New Yorker described the jukebox as such, but then maybe he was being cryptic since 'eclectic' is in fact an anagram for 'obscure crap' (give or take a few letters, obviously). If an eclectic crowd is what you are after then the Kettle of Fish is apparently the place to go; but, eclectic or not, the atmosphere is that of a local and you get the impression that tourists are tolerated rather than welcomed.

The bar itself is split into two areas, the main bar section has the usual collection of stools round the bar and space for the drinkers who prefer to eschew the seating in favor of their own two feet. The back room has a couple of sofas and what is clearly a two man garden seat, a wooden one, so don't be fooled by that comfortable chairs in the back room claim. The back room also houses a pinball table, a large screen TV and a dartboard with an impressive collection of darts trophies from the league matches that are held weekly. There is also a quiz machine, but since the gambling laws don't allow any payout it's not going to be the source of the next round, no matter how smart you are.

The toilet facilities are standard for New York bars, ie. crap. They're like a busy club in Brixton on a Saturday night, 1 out 1 in, dark and seedy and you'd have to be pissed to want to go in. This one is novel due to the fact that the urinal is green, all the better to hide the fungus growing on it.

There was a fair amount of totty in evidence; they are usually well represented amongst the artistic types. But it has to be said the barmaid was minging. A bit harsh maybe, but the truth has to be told and is it too shallow to suggest that this American idea of compulsory tipping is harder when the recipient fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down? It probably is.

Review by AJS